CMK, big shops & headaches

I only ever go to Central Milton Keynes twice a year. Once just before Xmas to buy trinkets and things for loved ones and associates, and then again just after to take stuff back... Oh, and of course should Cliff ever do any more speciality roller skating classes then I would be up there quicker than a robber’s dog! Unfortunately though, I was recently honoured with the CMK shopping centre meter reading job which is about as enticing as lowering your genitalia into an active food mixer or actually being the self opinionated air head that is Alesha Dixon! The real problem with this job is that when you state to any member of sales staff and most managers that you need to see the electric meter you may as well be asking about astrophysics in Swahili due to their pained expression and comments like “I don’t even know where that is” Many enjoyable hours were lost to this pointless and frustrating game this week that will never to be returned to me. Add to this the rather annoying habit that the company has of often only putting the unit number or the name of the holding company in the address to be found and it sometimes feels like trying to find a needle in a very large 1980’s haystack with pay and display car parking. Having spent in excess of 20 minutes in the Disney store with the promo of the all new Lion King I really do now know about the Circle of life. Likewise in the Anne Summers store whilst on another fruitless meter hunt we only managed to find a confused freelance bra fitter from Luton (well that’s what he told us) and what I think must have been some comedy outtakes DVD from Casualty, called Doctor and Nurses in Bonkers 69. Krispy Kreme, well don’t even go there! The only one that was quite uplifting was Bravissimo where we received support in finding the meter by a CMK Security guard in two of the large loading bays.

Ok I am making light of it now in a tribute to Carry On sort of way, but when I really had the stuff to sort out it wasn’t too much fun!